LA boxing
i ditched my boxing instructor after two lessons, for reasons unrelated to his instruction abilities (was helping him with some web stuff, and his narcissistic ADD problems reminded me too much of modern teenagers). the same day, i scheduled a trial lesson at LA Boxing, a new chain in the DC area. what a joke, these spazz assholes. bleh!
first, a general announcement to all stupid fucks out there in the fitness industry: turn down the goddamned music, gangsta bumpkins. you think everybody walking through the door digs your music? the loudest music i’ve heard in a gym was from the LA boxing fools. they actually cranked “eye of the tiger” and similarly gag-inducing material as if it was cool stuff. all the way through this joke of a class — where there wasn’t even the slightest attempt at boxing instruction, but rather a laughable, sloppy mix of hyped up boxer posing and mimicry — the “teacher” is yelling and you can barely hear a word. fucking dumbass. he’s shouting so hard he’s running out of breath, and you still can’t hear. then he walks back and turns the music up even louder, like he’s a DJ instead of a boxing instructor. i wanted to walk out 20 minutes in, but felt it was important to stay and make sure i didn’t miss an offsetting finish. nah, it just got worse.
the main section at LA Boxing is basically a hanging garden of heavy bags. there’s enough space among them if everybody stays on the same side, but there were at least a few rounds where the “teacher” wanted us to do a flurry of punches, shift 90 degrees, and repeat. that would work if the shifts were regimented, but he just kicked it off with a shout, and then everybody was free-styling his way around each bag, running into his neighbor. cluster fuck on steroids.
there seemed to be some good boxers working out away from the class, and there’s a nice enough ring where you can spar, but if you’re interested in learning anything about boxing in a class, don’t even bother. the only thing i could have taken from the class was the complete unlearning of the good techniques my prior instructor instilled (despite his flaky problems). that’s all i could think of the whole time, that i was ruining whatever i’d gained earlier in the week.
LA boxing is apparently riding a trend where soccer moms and their younger sisters (the class was surprisingly female, though still not near 50/50) don boxing gloves and basically do an aerobics class with heavy bags. big deal. it’s not boxing, it sucks, and i doubt this fad can be sustained.
hey, LA boxing dumbasses: you’re not fooling this MFer, you slopmeister jocks with stone heads. the art of instruction evades you, despite your ability to throw a punch. what an offensive display, with crappy lighting, one shower for guys, no lockers, and so much slopped out bullshit you could slip in it and break your ass. that LA boxing’s caught on across the county is proof of the general public’s idiocy and trend sucking.
February 10th, 2007 at 23:50
I can not help but be amused at the shallow comments and profanity used in some of the cititical comments directed towards the LA BOXING franchise network and workout program. As the developer of the LA BOXING franchise program, with 30 years of experience in franchise development, I can state without hesitation that LA BOXING will become one of the best known franchise brands in the United States in the next 2 years. We have sold 57 franchises in 16 states and Puerto Rico in 28 months of selling franchises. The company is 14 years old and only started offering franchises since September 2004. This will become one of the great success stories in the franchise world and those of us reading ludicrous comments such as those posted on this site will surely have the last laugh. Those reading this blog should contact Carl Kosnar at franchise@laboxing.com and learn how you can become a part of this wonderful success story in the health and fitness industry. So, I suggest that rather than participate in posting moronic comments, that you investigate one of the most profitable franchise opportunities in the health and fitness industry. It is fun and I guarantee you will love this business.
Sincerely,
Carl Kosnar
Franchise Development Consultant
LA BOXING Franchise Company
3195-H Redhill Avenue
Costa Mesa, CA 92626
714-668-0911
February 11th, 2007 at 00:42
shallow comments, carl? i challenge you to tell me what excellence in boxing is approached by having complete newbies jump up and down and throw mess at heavy bags, with a laughably frenetic and taxed boxing “instructor” drowned out by dreck music. go ahead, carl. let’s hear it.
you should go easy throwing around claims of “moronic”, considering that when LA boxing does have its spell of success (i’ve no doubt about that bit), it will come from a thundering horde of morons. you’re thwapping out at your customer base, big C! and on the record! egads. oh that’s right; they’re morons. no problem.
hey, maybe i was there for a fluke shit class. possible, i guess. i’ll never know because you won’t get me back into your apoplexy factory, hoss. in my brief time boxing (about a month), i’ve tried three different training situations, and LA boxing is by far at the bottom of the barrel. but who knows? maybe if i were more experienced, i’d consider LA boxing to be near the top of the bottom of the barrel. were it to rise higher than that, however, i’d need to be a brainless orangutan aspiring to jump up and down like a dumbass, swinging poorly at a heavy bag while some tired, ignorant, wannabe pro boxer pants something that sounds like, “ehhhowow. owhwhwiha. owieibiei. ughhhiwah.”
or maybe he said, “suckahs. suckahs. mah suckahs.”
yeah, that’s some real boxing training ya got there. my comments stand, franchise whore. now go find those toads you call customers! there’re out there, just waiting to give you their money. are you gonna take it, carl? are you man enough to take it?
A, always. B, be. C, closing. always be closing.
June 20th, 2007 at 09:00
Carl Kosnar is absolutely a Franchise Whore! There’s no doubt about that. The LA Boxing franchise was designed and created around the meager success of a gym in Orange County (Not LA I might mention). They came up with a “new” concept (If you consider a boxing gym or martial arts workout a new concept), gave it a fancy name like LA Boxing (remember they’re from Orange County) and sold it to suckers who would’ve preferred that their autographed photos were on their wall rather than those of the pro wrestlers and boxers they worship. LA Boxing is just a “Curves” for people who think that they want to “fight”
June 20th, 2007 at 10:59
OC Boxing musta been taken.
June 25th, 2010 at 19:54
100% agree-LA Boxing is a joke.Was looking for a boxing gym close by and this was the only “boxing” gym.Signed a month to month contract in case I didn’t like it-THANK GOD I had the sense to do that!
I told the gym worker that I wanted to do my own thing and not take the classes-he assured me that was ok.First day I arrive a class is about to start so I take a heavybag out of the way which is hard to do because they group them so close togeather.Then the music starts and I can’t hear anything and am trying not to bump into people.I have to basically sit in front of the bag and just punch-can’t move around it at all.WORSE they turn the ring timer OFF so I have no way of knowing the rounds.But the worst part of it all was having to watch the “students” throw these HORRIBLE punches on the bag and trying not to laugh.I mean some of these people in this class its there first time and the “instructor” has them throwing double hooks!
Figure I’ll give this another shot.@nd day and there having there “boxing” class if you want to call it that.I’m wrapping my hands and watching in shock as the instructor is teaching his students how to “box”.WOW.I have never seen worse instuctions given-it was sooo bad I wanted to go up to the instructor and say “WTF are you doing?” I hope none of these students ever spar someone with real boxing training because they would get CRUSHED.And the sad thing is these people are really thinking they are learning boxing skills.
You know what LA Boxing is? A fucking Billy Blanks workout with a heavybag.Its a disgrace that they use the word boxing in there name-because trust me it ain’t even close to a real boxing gym-hell you can’t even use there ring unless you take off your shoes???????
The only reason why I go is to use the heavybag and the hopes that one of there “instructors” asks me to spar.